Rantette: Temporary Employers

Dear Temporary Employer, perhaps we should get a few things straight.

I am not psychic in any major way. I may not know your organisation. I have only a vague idea of what you do or what my temporary role is to be; I most probably have never heard of you before. I may have heard of you but heard only bad things - all I can say after this past week in a particular division of my local council, is that all those bad things are confirmed. Now come the particular details.

You may have a particular set of tick boxes for new starts but I feel that more would be accomplished in telling me what to do than in taking ten minutes to adjust my desk chair ergonomically correctly.  I can do bugger all if you don't make sure that I can get into the computer system once I arrive. It might also be useful if you show me how to use the telephone system before you leave me alone to take calls during the lunch hour and please let me know who I might be expected to take calls for while their secretary is absent, rather than let that secretary tell me four days into the assignment. I can't do your filing instantly without you showing me the system and spending a little time telling me what the subjects of papers are if they are not immediately obvious; it's not my fault if I have to wait for stationery particularly when you are in charge of the budget and stationery cannot be ordered before the new financial year. Some people's habits and personality do give accountants a bad name. Don't bad-mouth me to my agency that I'm not taking enough initiative when you haven't given me enough information to do what I've actually been asked to do. It also helps to explain where and how to access documents and where typed documents should be saved to. Despite asking all other secretaries if there is work I can do for them, it is not always quicker and easier for them to hand over work to someone who will need to be shown everything about the system (because you haven't done it at the outset) and departmental standards. If I am interrupted for ten minutes in total during my lunch hour (which you will not pay me for), I am entitled to take that time at the end of the lunch hour; I don't work if you don't pay me.

Finally, when you decide to terminate an ongoing assignment after three and a half days with only quarter of an hour's notice, don't be surprised that the temporary employee is delighted to escape even though you haven't had the integrity to pay for the whole week - they won't get any more work that week. In addition, when the permanent secretaries tell the temporary employee that she hasn't been given a chance despite doing everything asked and just being plonked down and left to sink or swim, just know that your employees despise you for your lack of integrity, humanity and management skills. And no one is surprised that you are permanently advertising for professional staff when all those qualified professionals who live in your council area prefer to work for neighbouring councils.

Briefly - you stink as people and as employers. I have worked for many temporary employers and the majority of them have been professional, just and organised; it's a pity that some - like you - give the others a bad name.